Tuesday, August 6, 2013

It's All in the Name


I do not have a degree in linguistics, nor do I pretend to actually be fully knowledgeable about the English language. However, in my lifespan thus far, I have encountered some complexities in the English language that are worth sharing.


Professional – This adjective is added to the description of beauty products to immediately raise the impression of the quality and allow for a 50% price increase. It’s not just a nose hair trimmer…it’s a professional nose hair trimmer. See the difference? Immediately that word alone makes you covet the product that much more and justify you paying double the price.



Organic - When applied to any product, this word immediately increases both the cost AND your social status. Win win! When you're using organic products, no one can judge you because you are obviously more concerned about the environment/bodily toxins/overspending than they will ever be. 



Hipster – This movement of people dressing and acting ironically was definitely set into motion by someone who didn’t know how to be cool and also owned a lot of ugly clothing. A hideous knit brown sweater is cool if it’s deemed a hipster sweater. It also has become acceptable to drink out of glass jars (just like pioneers did!) and complain about how wrong it is to give in to expensive indulgences (while simultaneously owning every Apple product in existence).


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